Wedding speeches are a time-honored tradition, offering an opportunity for loved ones to share their joy, memories, and blessings with the newlyweds. Choosing the right people to make a toast can be tricky, but with a little guidance, you can ensure the toasts at your wedding are a memorable experience (for only the right reasons). As experienced wedding planners we have all the tips you’ll need to decide who should give a wedding toast, along with tips to ensure the speeches are enjoyable for everyone.

Who Should Make a Wedding Speech?

While theoretically anyone can make a toast on your wedding day, there are a few traditional choices you may want to consider.

Parents: Traditionally, the parents of the couple have a special role in making a toast. The father of the bride typically gives the first toast, welcoming guests and sharing a few words about the bride and groom. The groom’s parents might also offer their blessings and congratulations, often during the rehearsal dinner. This can be a great way to honor your parents and allow them to address their friends and family on what is also a very joyful day for them!

Maid of Honor and Best Man: These key members of the wedding party are usually chosen to speak because of their close relationship with the couple. The Maid of Honor speech might share a favorite memory with the bride, highlighting their friendship and the couple’s journey. The Best Man often follows, providing a mix of humor and heartfelt sentiments about the groom and the couple’s love story. This can be a great option, as often you Maid of Honor and Best Man are people you have shared a lot of life experience with, and would be blessed to have speak on your behalf.

Siblings: Including siblings in the toasts can add a unique and personal touch. They often have a deep understanding of both the bride and groom, making their speeches especially meaningful. Shared childhoods make for excellent, heartfelt anecdotes and funny stories, and including them in speeches can be a sweet way to begin your blended family life.

Close Friends and Relatives: Some couples may choose to have close friends or other relatives give toasts. These individuals should be those who have played a significant role in the couple’s lives and can speak to their relationship’s growth and significance. This can be a great choice depending on your family dynamics. If more traditional options like parents or members of the wedding party are, for whatever reason, unavailable or simply not the person who you’d like to speak on your wedding day.

Factors to Consider When Choosing Speakers

Personality and Speaking Style: It’s important to consider the personality of each person you’re considering for a wedding speech. Will they be comfortable speaking in front of a crowd? Do they have a tendency to make inappropriate comments? Are they talkers? Choose individuals who will honor the occasion and keep the focus on celebrating your relationship.

Choose Speakers Who Know Both of You: Whenever possible, try to choose at least one or two speakers who know both the bride and groom well and can speak to the strength of their relationship. This keeps the toasts focused on the happy couple instead of getting too heavily one-sided.

Avoiding Awkward Moments: If a potential speaker might make an awkward or inappropriate comment, it’s best to choose someone else. You can suggest other ways for them to express their sentiments, such as at a less formal event like the rehearsal dinner or a bridal shower. You can also simply say “no, thank you” if you know that a speech at any event will make you uncomfortable or share an embarrassing story you would rather not hear!

Wedding Speech Tips

1. Set a Time Limit

Setting a time limit for toasts is crucial to keep the day flowing smoothly. We recommend keeping each wedding speech between 3-5 minutes. This allows enough time for the speaker to share their thoughts and anecdotes without dragging on. Typically, 3-5 toasts is the sweet spot, as it keeps the energy high and prevents guests from losing interest.

2. When to Toast

The timing of the toasts can significantly impact the wedding’s schedule. Here are a few options to consider:

Before Dinner: Having the toasts before dinner is a traditional approach that sets a celebratory tone for the meal. However, this can delay dinner service, which might make guests restless, especially if they are hungry.

During Dinner: Some couples opt to have toasts during dinner. This can be a good way to multitask, keeping guests entertained while they eat. However, it can also be distracting and may delay your vendors’ meal breaks as well as your opportunity to eat.

After Dinner: Toasts after dinner can be a relaxed and enjoyable way to transition into the evening’s festivities, like dancing. This option ensures that everyone, including vendors, has had a chance to eat and relax. However, this can be difficult for those who are nervous about public speaking. They may not be able to enjoy their dinner knowing they still have a wedding speech to make.

3. Brief Your Speakers

Encourage them to keep their speeches focused and to avoid inside jokes that not all guests will understand. Let them know about any time limits and what order they will be going in so they can feel prepared and confident.

4. Consider a Toastmaster

Having a designated person, such as the DJ, introduce speakers and manage the flow of toasts can be very helpful. This can prevent awkward silences or help hedge in a run-on speaker.

Need help deciding on a DJ? Check out this blog!

Make Your Wedding Speech Choice with Confidence

Choosing who makes a toast at your wedding is a personal decision that can add depth to your celebration. With thoughtful planning, you can ensure that these moments are memorable in the best way. Don’t hesitate to discuss your options with your wedding planner. They can help you navigate these decisions and create a seamless experience on your big day!

If you’re looking for someone to help you navigate these, and the many other decisions in the wedding planning process, don’t hesitate to schedule your consultation with us today!

Photographers Featured in this Blog

Angelika Krug Photography

Leslie Ramsuchit Photography

We can’t wait to help you plan your dream wedding day. Let’s get started, book a consultation with Blush today!